The Amish girls lived out on farms,
And could never show off their charms.
One day they rebelled,
At their moms they yelled—
“We demand the right to ‘bare arms’!”
There was an old fellow named Jake
Who lived through a 9 point 0 quake.
It destroyed his house,
Injured his spouse
The guy never got a fair shake!
There was an old cook from Cape Ann
Who had trouble finding a man.
She looked low and high
To find the right guy,
But always found something to pan.
A dyslexic preacher from Prague
Sunday mornings went for a jog.
He’d run to his church,
Climb up on his perch—
And proceed to preach about Dog.
LEW WHITAKER has written several small books of Limericks, Haiku, and stories for children and adults. His Complete Limericks are available on Amazon.